Monday, June 22, 2015

the final frontier

Good evening Relatives

How are you?  We are so far apart  like a cosmic event whose impetus we are barely able to discern is blowing us out to sea so far from each other  so far from what we once were  so strong and yet so subtle that the change in our heading is often not recognized until the shore upon which we land becomes the ocean that separates us one from the other

I watched two movies today  the first was a spoof on spy/bond movies  called the kingsmen  starring colin firth  I like him   it was ok actually funny and original almost elegant in an odd way  that lured me in maybe because I am part Scottish and there was a lot of plaid and great accents   anyhow  in the film a black man causes/directs/purposefully coordinates the murder of fifty or more white people in a church in Kentucky  I understand  intellectually that it is a film a spoof not real  but it immediately and irrevocably brought to my mind the memory of the very real event of a white man murdering multiple black people in a  church in south carolina / charleston   and once I was deposited on that shore  wondering about the exact mirror of murder between "reality" and "the movies" I got stuck

I got stuck because I couldn't figure out which came first the movie or the murder? I didn't like it and because of the deaths in charleston I couldn't go back to being "lost" in the movie.  maybe that is a good thing, maybe it means that film has outgrown its ability to give us a place to go where we can escape who we are and who we live with and are surrounded by   maybe that is a good thing because it removes one more buffer    

but it also made me feel like I live on a different continent than perhaps lots of other people do and that made me wonder how should I feel about that?  and I haven't decided yet to settle on one feeling more than another.

I feel as if I am standing on that shore watching people die over and over and cannot escape the loss of humanity that translates in to action into psychotic disregard for life  into the over and over and over and over insatiable impulse towards violence  violence that leaves an impact a scar that cannot be moderated   and I wondered if that man in south carolina who killed those people in that church had watched the same movie

a horrific  scene  both in Charleston and in the movie, senseless in so many ways and on so many levels and so unexpected and yet part of me was not surprised but sad and it felt to me like my world, my shore drifted a little further away from the shore that everyone else lives on and even though it was a little sad and silent i was ok with the idea that I don't live on that shore  and I wondered at where or what shore did the librarian who recommended that movie to me today was standing on when she talked about the hilarity of the film and how funny it was as if the link to the dead in the church never happened

I see myself standing on a different shore  perhaps in the same world perhaps not I am not sure and I am no longer sure that it matters really  not because I am deluding myself into thinking a blind eye will make the dead not visible but because I know that in my place, in me, in my world I see something that I choose to reject and attentively down to the minutia of activation out of my life and world   and that something is violence    violence gets no oxygen in my life on my planet

when I fell in 2012 my brain got disconnected  there were other physical and mental injuries I had to address and have been  and have been working towards recovering the use of my physical self  but my brain  my memory my ability to retrieve, assess, collate, finesse and weave into reality the vast array of what it is that was available in the world around me  in my world in my life got disrupted severely  it got crushed so badly  so disconnected that I was afraid that I would never know myself again

that I would never be able to recognize me  or avail myself of the me that I knew like an old friend  the oldest friend  in my life  I knew right away i would never be able to be a doctor practicing again because the blanks in my cognition were so vast and so complete to me that I knew at least that I could remember that I could not remember what it was and would be necessary to take care of a patient  and I still remember that the first part of my oath was to first do no harm

its not disappointing to not be a doctor practicing again,  I was a good doctor,  I remember that,  it already happened, I'm not addicted to what I was   what is disappointing is that I have yet to find someone who understands that its not important to me to be a doctor any more, I am proud of me for being able to be enough of a doctor to say no to practicing, and to have the courage to walk away from what was into a life I have no idea about,  and that I recognize that the most important thing is, that I be important to me, that I value me really, truly, perfectly.  the most Important thing is not that what they project on me is mourned or strived for   its disappointing that they don't seem to hear me or value me now  and the shores on which we stand again drift further apart

but I am arriving at a functional brain again  I am healing and it is a relief to me  I have lost somethings that I will never recover and I will not begrudge me this even as I find the limits sometimes through exhaustion  sometimes through physical reaction  ( I am getting ready to move and when one of my friends told me she would even though she hated the thought of it, would bring her horse trailer out to pipestone and help me move and she wanted to know how much stuff I had to move I found that inside of me there no longer existed that person who could have that conversation with a friend, and i got scared, and I got hot and I said to her that I didn't have the ability any longer to discuss that with her or anyone else and that the thought of that discussion, trying to defend what I had or coordinate with someone about why was I moving this or that and why was I making my choices and timing I no longer could do that and inside of me I got scared and got angry because it felt like a wall that I could never possibly climb or even imagine a door in let along figure out how to open and go through it, so i preferred to move by myself with no help because I didn't want to feel that sense of fear and inability so irrevocably in myself so I just told her and that was that and in a little bit the fear went away and I didn't have to be the person who overcame her lack of skill because I quite frankly just never would again be able to do it so it was ok to simply say I can't go there any longer and find a different place to go  find a place that I could go and go there instead) and today when i was bringing things down the stairs carefully and slowly  after about three things, three times down the stairs I found that I was hyperventilating and scared and dizzy  so I stopped and I said to me  good job  and good for you that you stopped  tomorrow you can try again

so what I wonder is do you think I have to or will have to have a whole new set of friends that don't know me since the me I am today doesn't really too much resemble the me I was yesterday?  and do you think that whole new set of friends will be because I can't relate any longer or because my old friends were so invested in who I was that they can't reconcile even if I can that I am no longer on that shore of familiarity  

is that what love is ?  having the impetus to love yourself to recognize that I am so amazing and so able even when I no longer am very much at all what I was or who I was?  do you think there will be people in my life who care for my essence and understand that the expression of me as myself is still a universe that is unfolding and do you think they will celebrate me or abandon ship cut the ties between the interests, the hearts that watch across the void that allows me to unfold without fear without design and allows me to see them as they are and enjoy that they are so not me ?

the second film I watched was Still Alice   I had read the book  I was a little afraid of the movie  but it worked out   I took a chance on Julianne Moore and she delivered   its a good movie  no one wants to face the reality that their reality is so vastly different from everyone else  or that there is no way that they can reverse the propulsion that is carrying them away from what was into what is and what will be


it's ok   perhaps I could have more  I am not sure really   but what Ic an tell all you other space and time travelers is that I have me  and I know me  and I am peacefully pleased to know me still, after all these years

sleep tight

mb

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