Well Good Morning Relatives
I feel better today I've been fighting some sort of flu thingy achy tired hot prickly head exhausted thingy and last night sometime in the night I had a big fever and it left my body clearer lighter and a bit tired but not sick any longer
kind of like struggling with self don't you think? one time I heard someone say I've been sick and I am well now so I'm calling in well today and won't be back to work
eventually we have to decide what our work is and if we are going to do it and if we are going to stop nattering on about what it creates around and in us LOL do you trust your work relatives? is your work what you make? or what makes you? no matter the work that question is applicable and it turns not on the type of work but on the hands and heart and mind that engage it my father taught me that when a perspective changes everything changes ( not the body or the work or the environment or the ???) the perspective changes everything and in the book Light on the Path it talks about our work and our perspective
there is always doubt in one form or another there is always a little fear and in those times it is easy to give myself over to the flow of the river but if I am standing in the wrong river ( and what I mean by river is the flow of my mind and my perception) and if I am letting go so that my mind is blank and my life non responsible (as if this would save a drowning rat lol having its eyes closed) if I am holding my breath the breath of my souls engagement then I am not living I am stagnant I am cumbersome and filling up with silt covered up with weed not the yummy healthy kind that brings minerals and iron to water but the clingy suffocating trash catching kind that suffocate and bury my soul beneath the subtle pull of what I think of as the current of the dead
how is one radical? radical is one small thing over and over shifting the stream to a slightly different course I don't know how many times at work I tell myself over and over each person is a real person each engagement is to because of me and who I am to be clear and honest and one to one over and over and over and over and over and over and over again never ever the same never ever the same why is that
why do that in a stop and rob connivence store as a cashier making minimum wage for hours on end?
why is grace reserved for pain why is prayer reserved for church or for need why is kindness not the mortar between our bricks why what I think i am talking about is authenticity yet some would say that authenticity is being who one is even if who that is is inanimately disconnected from the soul and i suppose that is so
but we are women and men of action we are living beings we are fueled by the eternal fire of life and so because we have choice we choose we choose living death or living life with every breath which never until this moment has been drawn or expelled is the breath I breath out going to make you sick relative when you inhale it after I have taken it in and then let it out with ? a curse, gossip, derision, negativity, fear of lack, ridicule, ……. what is it how is my breath shaping the world? how is my breath doing inside of you relatives? and how is yours doing inside of me or your neighbor? is it life giving? or is it poison? it is of course up to you to me to us and thus like the trees around us and other living things the breath is filtered it is cleansed and yet only the human was given the ability to transform it to taint it to change it and its molecules so relatives how is it that we take care of this great gift this great love that is entrusted to us? hmmmmmm? how is it that we do this well I can tell you its not magic and its not spiritual or religious it is however decidedly kung fu ish and it is totally Kung Fu Pandamonious
and when we work towards our selves as ourselves if we are working and gardening and cutting and pasting and sewing and stitching and laughing and burping and garfing we are remaking our world in the image of ourselvesand there will come a time that we will fall into an "illness" a funk a fever an ache a sickness why is that it is not reasonable to think that we are not exposed to things that can make us sick it is not reasonable to think that we in the reanimation of our selves will need to slough that which was dead with in us and this the body does with inflammation pus fever and many many signs of the work it takes an organism to clean house
in the night I was at a market visiting with people who came there and It was interesting trying to decide where to park the mini there was a woman who followed me from table to table she wanted me to bring her garlic to polish her silver ring I wasn't wanting to give her my garlic as it was difficult to come by so I asked the chef at the place we were sitting and others eating if he had any and he said only the kind that santa brings it was in a round plastic container dried and mixed with seaweed and I wondered win was it that santa started giving that in the place of the real living thing and then I wondered it santa had changed suppliers to keep up with demand which made me wonder about the purpose of demand and how it creates fear of lack which I was sick with and then i thought poor santa what have we done to him and to all the children? what have we done? and while I was worried not about my garlic but about why I was more concerned with lack than giving or abundance I realized she only needed one little clove of which i had many and as I reached to peel it and give it she was on to other things and I was left to hold the garlic and smell it on my hands at which point I looked up and asked the owner did I order any food? and she said yes you ordered bran and a peach after which giving to me my food a young man came and put his arm around me and he said I chose to stay here I chose to stay because of you and I chose to shed pain and live in peace and in a clear heart I knew then when he touched me that he was an innocent and that he had or was contemplating ending his life and that somehow what is saw or felt between the little space of our lives together it made him change his mind it made him believe oogway says we only have to believe santa is real if we believe and there is plenty of garlic if we believe if I believe it can change one life and is not one life worth everything? he hugged me with his long white arm and as he did he filled me with light that even now as I write you I can feel inside of me then he said i love you and strangest of all things I believed him
then I woke up no longer sick no longer achey and no longer covered in sweat
so what would master oogway say I see you have found the sacred peach tree of heavenly wisdom so why are you upset? Noodles not Noodles? you are too concerned with what was and what will be yesterday is history tomorrow is a mystery but today is a gift
that is why they call it the present
santa clause gave us all garlic today relatives enjoy the peach and I do recommend bran for the constipation of stuck thinking LOL
life is a mirror look clearly without smoke gently but honestly and try to trust the big picture as you pick your nose hairs
love love love
mary
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